Single Parents Share Their Survival Strategies Post-Split

By

Gabrielle White

Finding your way through single life after a breakup or divorce is hard, and being a parent adds even more dimensions, both challenging and rewarding. Today we've rounded up some of our favorite bits of wisdom from parents who have been there and found ways to thrive.

"Once I left my marriage, I decided to pursue my own dreams. These dreams had been pushed somewhere in the dark corners of my brain. I always wanted to write books and inspire people through my words. These little dreams started to pop up and annoy the hell out of me once I was on my own. But how was I supposed to do that, while working two jobs, getting a Master's degree and raising three teenagers? I just decided to sit down and write, I wrote anything that came to my mind. And I ended up writing and publishing two books four years after I became a single parent. But the most interesting thing happened -- when my children saw me pursing my dream, something changed in them. My oldest started to pursue his dream of doing research in gravitational Physics and the younger ones started to talk about their dreams and aspirations."

-Tami Shaikh on why she loves being a single parent(Huffington Post)

“And accepting help when offered is not a sign of weakness. Nor is it a badge to wear. Accepting help when offered is a sign of strength, of the ability to balance the giving and receiving of energy. Allow the energy of receiving to be part of your day, each and every day. It can present itself in many forms; a stranger holding a door, someone allowing you to go first at a light, or a simply a smile.” "As a single mom, it may be challenging to ask for help, as you want to assert your strength and independence. Well, at least this was true for me. But I know that I’m a work in progress and I'm getting better at owning when I need support. Acceptance is a muscle that needs to be recognized, stretched and toned. Sometimes we actually need to be taught that it’s even there in the first place."

-Kristen Darcy shares her tips for to make every day life easier as a single mom(Mind Body Green)

"Me coming here, lifting weights, I had never done that before. Now I have so much energy. I am a happier parent...My boys and I do all kinds of active things together now. I take zero medicines for my health. I really believe we have to put ourselves first because our kids need us.” 

-Kathie Patterson on finding motivation in Crossfit after her divorce (MyFox8 Interview)

"There are indeed pros to choosing to divorce rather than to stay married when there are kids or no kids involved, but it is hard as a parent to not feel as if you have done something to hurt your kids by choosing to dissolve your marriage. But that guilt — divorce guilt — can really kill you and hurt your kids. It's just one emotion, sure, but guilt will fuel so many of your choices as a parent and as a person when you are burdened with intense personal responsibility for deciding to divorce and are unable to let that guilt go."

-Laura Lifshitz on how to recognize and let go of divorce guilt (PopSugar)

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