Alone, Afraid, and Broken: A Poem


Photo By Samuel Ferrara On Unsplash

By A Mender

You’ve broken me down to my core, I have nothing more.
You pretended to be a man I could love,
But in the end you just dragged me through the mud.
I took so many precautions to protect my heart,
And in a matter of minutes you tore it apart.
Such selfish behavior I just can’t believe,
This reality I cannot fully heed.
I loved you completely with all of my heart,
And you lied to my face right from the start.
You looked in my eyes and never told me the truth,
Until you were confronted and there was nothing but proof.
I was vulnerable with you in a way I’ve never been,
In a way I may never allow myself to be again.
I can’t sleep I can’t eat I’m like a f*cking lost child,
And I wonder if for you this is all just so mild.
You told me your secrets and you begged and cried,
Was it all just an act to console your hurt pride?
I know for a fact that you just can’t be alone,
So were you the dog and I was nothing but a bone?
I want to hate you oh so badly I do,
Because you convinced me to open myself up to you.
But I can’t seem to do it, no matter how I try,
And I can’t seem to accept this final goodbye.
I know deep down that I need to move on,
But it hurts so damn badly now that you’re gone.
You promised me you’d do whatever it took,
Then just ran out of my life w/ out a second look.
I loved every part of you even after it all came out,
And tried so damn hard to turn things about.
I know there were things I could’ve done better,
But you always seem to run when we hit bad weather.
I realize now you’re a weak selfish man,
And yet I still dream all day of holding your hand.
You made me so happy and took away my pain,
Yet you did all these things for your selfish gain.
You sought me out to partake in your game,
And I had no f*cking clue you’d bring so much pain.
I saw deep in your soul that your heart is pure,
And thought that maybe you could be my life’s cure.
But here I am alone, afraid and broken,
Feeling like nothing more than a measly token.
I hope to god that the guilt you feel is real,
And that you spend your free time starting to feel.
I guess I can empathize with the person you are,
I used to be full of fear, with a heart covered in tar.
But when you hit rock bottom and are faced with the truth,
You can no longer hide from yourself all this proof.
Please let out your pain even though it’s hard,
So your actions never leave anyone else feeling this scarred.
I’m sure one day I’ll look back with a smile,
And understand deep inside that this was all worth while.
But for the time being I lay here oozing with pain,
My heart shattered and empty, as if it’s been stained.

writer photo

A Mender

An anonymous Mender sharing their story. If you'd like to share your story anonymously, send it to: