4 Signs That You Should Take A Break From Dating



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By Laura Yates



Dating, although great fun, can sometimes feel like more of a hindrance to your sense of well-being. If you're feeling frustrated or just burned out by the whole dating game, here are a few signs that it could be time to take a break:

1) It’s starting to feel like an obligation

Dating should be something you feel excited by and want to do, not something you feel you ‘have’ to do. If you’re resenting the time you’re spending going on dates or interacting with people online, you won’t be approaching it with the right energy, meaning it just won’t be fun for you. 

Try taking a break - even for a few weeks and use this time to do the things you really want to do instead. You’ll feel far more fulfilled, refreshed and will possibly end up meeting people more naturally that way!

2) You’re using dating as your main chance at happiness

Dating can be a bit of a numbers game, which means it can be somewhat hit or miss. So it’s really important to be relaxed and have an ‘abundant’ mentality with it. If you’re approaching it from a place of scarcity and seeing every date or potential person as your only opportunity for fulfillment, you’re going to be setting yourself up for disappointment and hurt if that doesn’t work out. 

The less outcome dependent you can be about dating, the more you’ll enjoy it as an experience. If you’re pinning everything on meeting someone, taking a step back to fill your life up with things you love and to reassess what makes you happy as you, will be a far more rewarding experience. You’ll also be setting yourself up better to enjoy dating when the time is right.

3) You’re dating because you know your ex has met someone

Knowing your ex has met someone else can be heartbreaking, and pile on the pressure for you to do so even more. But ultimately, if you’re dating mainly for this reason, it’s really a sign that you’re not genuinely ready. That’s okay, as now is the time to define happiness on your terms, not your ex’s. 

You’ll be in a much better place to meet someone when you don’t feel that pressure or when dating isn’t in any way a response to your ex. So focus on you. Do what you love, commit to your goals and spend time with the people you love instead of feeling like you have to date.

4) You’re feeling entirely disillusioned and your self-esteem has taken a knock after a string of bad dates

There’s a certain amount of emotional resilience needed to date, especially in the world of dating online. It’s common to feel disheartened every now and then. So if you’ve had some bad dates and they’ve left you feeling low in confidence or hopeless, try taking a little break. 

This isn’t about advising you to give up - after all, every date that didn’t work out is a step closer to the one that will! But when you’re in a place of feeling this way, giving yourself some time out for an emotional pep-up can be all you need to get back out there refreshed and positive again. It can also help you to get perspective on what’s not working for you and reassess how you’re dating or the type of people you’re dating.

Taking a break from dating is no bad thing. In fact, it will set you up so much better for when you do feel ready again. Whether it’s a few weeks or months, do what feels right and good for you. The right person will show up when you’re feeling confident, positive and even a little excited about dating. 

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Laura Yates

Laura is a coach, writer and speaker specialising in helping people to bounce back, relieve stress in their lives, heal and transform their everyday. Laura has been featured in VICE, Glamour, Match.com, Eharmony and the Daily Mail plus others.

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