It's easy for relationships to become routine. We often forget that appreciation, honesty, and open communication are essential ingredients for a healthy and thriving relationship.
So how can we restart love? In this video, The School of Life poses 7 different questions to ask if you're looking to refresh and renew your relationship.
The 7 questions were created to encourage honesty, confession, and confrontation. If you’re going to use them, it’s important to set the intention of being compassionate, kind, and calm. It’s not about blaming, expressing bitterness, or making your partner feel bad. It's simply about sharing. The questions are designed to create a whole new level of knowing and understanding between you both.
So here are the 7 questions:
1. What would I like to be appreciated for?
This question allows you both to acknowledge your strengths and weaknesses.
2. When I’m in a panic I...
This fill in the blank question lets you talk about your weaknesses and where you can offer support to each other during hard times.
3. I’d probably be more normal if the following thing hadn’t have happened in my childhood….
This question helps to provide context behind why you do certain things. It then helps your partner understand you on a more intimate level. Whatever has happened in your past is not an excuse, but it helps to make sense of why you do the things you do.
4. What would I like to be forgiven for?
This question is acknowledges that you’re not perfect (and that that’s ok!) while also allowing you to own your weaknesses.
5. Where I’d love you to realize you hurt me is….
If you carry pain from past events you’ve found hard to articulate, this question provides a space to talk openly and honestly about it.
6. What would help me to change is if you…
This one is all about mutual respect. If you want to change, know that it's important to listen to your partner deeply, and understand that it takes two to tango.
7. What I’d miss so much about you is...
This is a lovely question to end on, as it lets you show how much you love your partner and why. Since love is so easily taken for granted, putting meaning behind it will leave you both in a great place.
What do you think about the 7 questions and would you use them in your relationship?