8 Subtle Signs That Your Partner Is Not Right For You



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By Isabell Gaylord



Sometimes a breakup can be a good thing. That’s especially true if we’re in a relationship that isn’t quite right for us. But it isn’t always easy to spot the subtle signs which might suggest that our partners aren’t quite right for us. 

To help you get some clarity on this, here are ten common signs that your partner may not be right for you:

1. They negatively affect your confidence

If you realize that your confidence is being affected by the little comments that your partner makes and the little things that they do, it’s a reliable warning sign that they aren't treating you the way they should (which should boost your confidence) and you’re at risk of losing your confidence over time.

2. They don't value what you have to say

The sign of a good conversation is when both people in a relationship are actively listening to each other as opposed to just waiting to speak or talking over each other. If your partner regularly interrupts you when you’re talking, it shows that they’re not really listening and don't value what you have to say.

3. They don’t respect your job

If your partner doesn’t care about your job, and if they avoid talking about it or keep on changing the subject, it may be a sign that they don’t really care about you as much as you might have thought. A person who cares about you will take an interest in your interests, including what you do for a living, what you study or what you enjoy doing as hobbies.

4. They don’t support you when you evolve

Building from the last point, personal improvement (including career and job advancement) is an important part of your evolution and your partner should support you in this by listening, providing advice and being a sounding board for your ideas and dreams. 

5. They lie

This one almost goes without saying. If your partner lies to you, even about something that seems relatively benign, it can be a sign that they aren't the right partner for you. A true partnership is one built on mutual trust and respect, which means they are honest with you.

6. Your life goals differ

Sometimes, it’s not a case of your partner doing something wrong. Instead, the two of you can end up taking different paths in life and simply drifting apart. It's important to recognize if there's enough common ground to have a healthy relationship, or if you would be better off with someone who is more compatible.

7. One of you is unhappy

When you love someone, you sometimes need to let them go. This is true if you’re in a relationship and one or two of you is unhappy in the lives that you’re leading. When you're in a healthy relationship, you're happy most of the time with the relationship. If you find that you're mostly unhappy with the person you're in a relationship with, pay attention to your feelings and try to uncover why. 

8. You can feel it

Sometimes the most obvious sign that your partner isn’t right for you is that you feel it as something instinctive inside of you. If that’s the case, it can be a good idea to discuss it with them to see what they feel. Don't dismiss the importance of intuition.

Do any of the subtle signs that we’ve talked about today sound familiar to you? If so, it may be a sign that you need to have a talk. Just make sure that you give your partner the chance to understand and to explain their side of things. It's not always easy to end relationships that aren't quite right, but sometimes it's the only way to open yourself up to something greater.

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Isabell Gaylord

Isabell Gaylord is a freelance writer, journalist, and author who writes for a variety of sites and on a mixture of topics, ranging from dissertation writing services to education, psychology and the world of business.