#howimend: UniqueLA Founder Sonja Rasula On Staying Friends With Exes

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By Kate Paguinto


Sonja Rasula is the founder of Unique Markets, a series of nationwide shopping events that feature made-in-America products from up-and-coming entrepreneurs. Her goal is to support local artists and designers while simultaneously enriching the small business community and the US economy. Sonja is also a strategist, motivational speaker and self-proclaimed French-fry lover. 

We asked Sonja a few questions about heartbreak and she opened up about staying friends with her exes post-breakup.

Check out Sonja's site or follow her on Instagram here.

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If you think back to the first time you were heartbroken, what advice would you give to that younger version of yourself?

"Do not worry about a thing! Let yourself grieve, that's important, but do not dwell in it. Better things are always waiting for you in the world, trust and know that."

What has heartbreak taught you about yourself?

"That it's not easy but it's better to be heartbroken and alone than with someone and lonely."

What are your rituals during a breakup? What things/practices/people helped you mend?

"I tend to fall deep into music, especially sad songs that torture me. Lol. I always focus on work, staying busy and friendships - friends can get you through anything!"

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Thinking back to breakups you’ve had, did you have any breakup vices (checking your ex’s Insta, etc) and how do you conquer them?

"OMG Instagram didn't exist the last time I broke up with someone (I'm married now), I can't imagine how hard that must be!!!! But a big vice of mine would be to let myself go back/spend time with the person/still engage in a physical relationship -- worst idea ever, it just prolongs the healing process."

What’s the biggest lesson you’ve learned about love so far in your life?

"It's extremely hard to figure out how to love yourself, and give yourself the amount of love and attention you deserve. But it's the most important thing!"

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Do you think exes can be friends?  Do you stay friends with your exes on social media?

"100% - If people aren't friends with their exes I tend to question everything about them! When you share your life and your love with a person and it doesn't work out, they have shared part of your life and you've been a part of their history. Just because it didn't work doesn't mean it's a bad thing. I'm not saying you should be best friends (that will get in the way of future love) but continuing to support one another throughout life, being happy for him/her in the future especially when they find a great new partner, and checking in every once in awhile is healthy."

What keeps your heart open, despite the heartbreaks you’ve had in your life?

"Hope! Life can be dark sometimes but it's also very very very good. Hope is what allows me to keep going, find new passions, discover new loves, etc."

What is your favorite song about heartbreak?

What projects are you currently working on, and looking forward to most?

Unique LA is always something that makes me happy and fills my heart with joy. :)

writer photo

Kate Paguinto

Kate is a Content Strategist at Mend and co-owner of a small business called Dizzy Cactus. She likes puns, Wes Anderson, and the Oxford comma.

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