When You Go To School With Your Ex


Candice Lim

My advice about seeing your ex in class is simple: keep it cordial because saying "hi" might be less awkward than ignoring them, and sit in the front so they don't distract you. Easy enough! But if you don't have a class together, you still might see them around.

Today, we're going to look inward and talk about ways to get over your ex even when they're on campus. College is a hyper-bubble that can have anywhere from 5,000 to 50,000 students. You most likely live, study, and socialize in the same five miles as the people at your school. While proximity doesn't help, there are meditation apps, books, and coping mechanisms to help you get over your ex.

1. Download a meditation or self care app.

When dealing with a breakup, it's important to take care of yourself. At Mend, we love meditation apps, such as Calm and The Mindfulness App. Taking time out of the day to work on yourself is the best thing to do. In college, our lives are hectic with classes here and social activities there, but these apps will help you focus on yourself and not on your ex. If you're not big on meditating, just take a few deep breaths before walking around a space where your ex might be.

2. Start journaling.

The breakup recovery process involves introspection, and journaling is a common self care ritual for a reason. By taking 15 minutes out of your day to jot down your thoughts and feelings, you can look back at the semester and see the progress you've made. Write about how seeing your ex or hearing about your ex makes you feel. If you find yourself flooded with thoughts of your ex, write them down and let them go. Letting them bounce around in your head will prove ineffective and time-consuming.

3. Throw yourself into a new club or activity.

Even if you're a senior in college, it's never too late to make friends and pursue new passions. Whether it's trying out for an improv group or joining a club sport, putting yourself out there will be really helpful and rejuvenating in moving forward. Making new friends and meeting new personalities will also open up your eyes to another side of campus life.

4. Explore and discover new places - alone.

Loneliness is a valid and common fear among millennials today. After a breakup, you are especially vulnerable to this fear but we want to encourage you to embrace how free being alone can feel. You can go wherever you want, whenever you want, and you never have to keep in mind anyone else's schedule or opinions. Is there a coffee shop or bookstore across town you've been dying to check out? Now is the perfect time to go! Mark it in your calendar as "time to explore" and be proud of embracing your individual power.

It might be hard to see your ex in class or on campus this semester, but our advice is to put yourself first. Ask what’s best for you and what can be done to make this easier on yourself. To get you started, here are our tips for getting over a bad breakup and movies to watch about breakup mistakes to avoid. This school year, make sure you’re focusing on yourself and living YOUR best life.

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