Summertime Sadness: How To Bounce Back From A Summer Fling

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By Laura Yates


Summer flings can feel amazing. They can feel exotic, exciting, exhilarating and like life couldn’t be better.

So when you cram all of those intense highs into a short period of time and then it ends, bouncing back from a summertime fling can be particularly difficult.

The summer season, going away or just being in more of a vacation mode can mean that you approach love and dating differently. You can find yourself attracted to people you wouldn't be - maybe someone who you know long-term isn’t quite right for you - or you can overlook your boundaries and better judgement in favor of the romance.

Here are some tips to help you bounce back from summertime sadness:

1. Give yourself perspective. Be aware that even if it feels like you knew the person really well, a few weeks or even a whole summer isn’t enough time to truly get to know someone. How you feel right now is real, definitely, but trust as more time goes on, you will start to see the holes in that relationship that you perhaps can’t see now.

2. Get inspired from it. Ask yourself what felt great about that relationship. So if you felt excitement and freedom, how can you bring more of that into your life? Use what made you feel really good as inspiration to incorporate that into your day-to-day world.

3. Find the purpose. Be grateful that you got to experience it. See this relationship, however short-lived, as something you gained, not something and someone you lost. Summer romances make for amazing memories that you might remember forever. So cherish that and celebrate it as opposed to dwelling that it’s over. Try to feel happy that you experienced it and recognize how much it enriched your life. Not all relationships are meant to last. Many are supposed to be short-term. They still serve a big purpose. What was that purpose for you? Choose to focus on that.

4. Focus on self care. Make sure you have plenty of self-care rituals during this time. Create new memories that represent this new season of your life. Fill your time with friends, hobbies, goals and new experiences. Try and avoid living in the past of that romance. Trust, that as it didn’t take you long for fall for that person, it won’t take you long to move forward from them either. Put yourself first and aim to make each day from here as nourishing and fulfilling as possible.

Finally, have faith that as each day goes by and as you start your daily rituals and routines again, bit by bit, you will start to feel better.

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Laura Yates

Laura is a coach, writer and speaker specialising in helping people to bounce back, relieve stress in their lives, heal and transform their everyday. Laura has been featured in VICE, Glamour, Match.com, Eharmony and the Daily Mail plus others. You can find Laura, her blog and website at www.laurayates.org

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