Hearing other people’s breakup stories makes us feel less alone, offers different perspectives and illustrates the many nuances of heartbreak. Here are 3 favorites we have been sharing and talking about at Mend HQ.
Why I Ended A Happy Relationship, by Haley Nahman
“It’s easy to misconstrue reluctance to leave as desire to stay. Especially when the source of our itch feels frustratingly nebulous and capable of destroying something precious. It doesn’t help that, as women, we’re constantly fed the notion that we ought to hold on to something good. To listen to everyone but ourselves.”
We love Haley's piece because it talks about something that many Menders are working through: why, even when something seems good or even perfect, it doesn’t mean that the relationship is right. She demonstrates that the catalyst for a breakup doesn’t have to be dramatic or sudden and that ultimately, trusting your own intuition is where the truth of what you really want resides. Even if leaving is more painful (at first) than staying.
You can read the rest of Haley's story here.
The 12 Hour Goodbye That Started Everything, by Miriam Johnson
“Hearts and minds can be as opaque as a rain forest; only small pieces of them are ever visible. And I realized this, too: You can’t contain the people you love. You can’t contain your own love, either.”
This next article beautifully depicts how relationships aren’t as transparent as we might think; especially when we get too immersed. Breakups are often not about rejecting someone, but usually more about a disconnection to ourselves in some way. Our job isn’t to find the answer. It’s to honor what that relationship and person ignited in us.
You can read the rest of Miriam's story here.
Why I Broke Up With The Man Who Seemed To Be My Soul Mate, by Elizabeth Cavanaugh
“At this juncture, we had to acknowledge what we had both sensed from the beginning. That, despite the outward appearance of sharing so much, our core values and future visions diverged profoundly. In fact, once we stopped looking so intensely at each other, we knew that the subtle discomfort we had felt sprung from our trying to hang on tight while heading in entirely different directions.”
This piece talks about how, even when we think we’ve met our soulmate, we may also have to listen to that inner nudge that it’s run its course. Sometimes, two people are meant to meet, have an experience together and then move on. It’s that special experience that served a purpose we should be grateful for.
You can read the rest of Elizabeth's story here.
Have you read a story that you've really loved recently? If you feel inspired to share your own story with us, please email us at firstname.lastname@example.org.